Anxiety and the Grocery Store

It's been a long time. I've been through migraines and pyschciatrists and pyschologysts and nuerologists and live with headaches almost daily. The only variance is the level. I also have anxiety issues, (I know, I have alot of issues. Poor hubby.) Today's lesson is about the anxiety. (This is meant to be funny, because now, looking back, it is funny, but , then, AUGH!!) The grocery store is one of my nemesis. A lot of people, thin aisles, somebody could touch me, (My personal freak out moment, stupid I know). When Mom was sick, I didn't let anyone touch me but a few select people and only after they had washed their hands and now, its flipped on me. I freak when I think someone is going to touch me. I don't have a problem with people themselves, but too many and too close and the hairs on the back of my neck start creeping. Throw in a couple of things than DO NOT belong in a grocery store and my anxiety level reaches a breaking point and I could hurl. I worked on Saturday and then went to the grocery store. I dont have kids, so I'm not really mindful of back to school time. I had to park further away than normal, (Neck hairs woke up, no biggie, I can deal. Anxiety level 1). As I walk toward the store, I notice a sign that reads, '300th Celebration of Back to School Shopping!'. (I'm gonna try, I gotta get over this, it is just a freakin' grocery store, no one is gonna touch me. Neck hairs stretching, saying hi to one another. Anxiety level 2) I get to the front of the store and they have a stand that is selling hot dogs and soda and inside the store there are three tables where kids can color pictures, decorate a cookie or make a thing to hang on their doorknob. (Is that a tiger? Yup, that is a dude dressed in a Tony the Tiger costume. That DOES NOT belong in a grocery store. I'm gonna try anyway. I will win. Neck hairs turn on some music. Anxiety level 5) I grab my santizer towel and wipe down my grocery cart and push it into the store. There seem to be 50 kids by those three tables, I'm sure there weren't, but to me there were. I like kids, love 'em actually, but today, eh, my nerves. (Wait, is that a cop? Why do they need a cop? Is Tony the Tiger gonna go ballistic because some kid pulled his tail? Seriously? WHY do they need a cop? Neck hairs are doing the conga. Come on, baby do the conga. I know you can't control yourself any longer. Anxiety level 7 ) I turned around to get the flyer for some coupons and looked at it for a second. (When I turned back to my cart, there was Batman, FRICKIN BATMAN, who DOES NOT belong in a grocery store and he was 6 inches from my face. Anxiety level 10) Anxiety wins. I'm out. Hubby had pizza, I had stromboli.